i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
