3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
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I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
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I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I licked your asshole in confidence.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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