we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
why do cheetos always look like penises
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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