You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
