is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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