check it out our google latitudes are spooning
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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