"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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