do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Randomize
