His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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