hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I want to make a zoo with you.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize