He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
