Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
