Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
