You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
