Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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