I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
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