Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
