My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
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