she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
of course. lets lasso hookers.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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