What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize
