Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
