Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
