I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
