In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize