who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
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