He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
