kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Text me some of your sweat
Will exercising make me less horny?
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