yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
