I hope mine doesn't look like that
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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