1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Sorry my hands just texted you
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
