I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Small penises have feelings too.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
