if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
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the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
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It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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