I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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