Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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