porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
