My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize