what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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