Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
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