Texts From Last Night

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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper

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  (612): i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper http://tfl.nu/3dw5
  Replies (27) Good night (667) Bad night (3875)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...

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  (404): I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl... http://tfl.nu/69tn
  Replies (29) Good night (3190) Bad night (630)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.

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  (305): We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction. http://tfl.nu/e3vr
  Replies (33) Good night (908) Bad night (5656)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.

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  (419): i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover. http://tfl.nu/0t27
  Replies (26) Good night (972) Bad night (4772)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me

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  (504): open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me http://tfl.nu/k62l
  Replies (1) Good night (2357) Bad night (982)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.

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  (404): So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving. http://tfl.nu/3jpq
  Replies (4) Good night (1809) Bad night (793)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.

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  (970): I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious. http://tfl.nu/wv8w
  Replies (6) Good night (625) Bad night (1488)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.

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  (503): Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day. http://tfl.nu/x1ay
  Replies (4) Good night (901) Bad night (480)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.

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  (303): Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way. http://tfl.nu/uitb
  Replies (7) Good night (612) Bad night (937)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast

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  (440): That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast http://tfl.nu/nk0g
  Replies (6) Good night (624) Bad night (303)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "

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  (317): I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time " http://tfl.nu/0ln5
  Replies (4) Good night (973) Bad night (424)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?

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  (609): So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face? http://tfl.nu/y6a3
  Replies (5) Good night (349) Bad night (1233)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.

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  (337): I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it. http://tfl.nu/cfzm
  Replies (1) Good night (549) Bad night (294)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.

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  (205): I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die. http://tfl.nu/2vzl
  Replies (1) Good night (312) Bad night (569)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks

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  (609): Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks http://tfl.nu/alp6
  Replies (5) Good night (106) Bad night (425)

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