wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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