Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
