Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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