i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
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