scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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