i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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