lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
