So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
