Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
