one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
