He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
