I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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