Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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